I think business schools should recruit professors from greeting card companies.  5.99 for a card for a holiday they probably created.  I can’t wait to see how much the card for Second Cousin’s Day costs.  We are obligated to respond, like lemmings.  Stimulus elicits response.  Christmas is here.  Buy presents.  Valentine’s Day is here.  Buy flowers and chocolates.  Father’s Day is here.  Buy ties and mugs.  Easter is here.  Hide eggs.  Are we really so easy to manipulate?  Can human behavior become so bound by simply naming a day?  Obviously, yes.  Recognition, Significance, Attention?  Is that what is at hand?

Mother’s Day.  It sounds nice as it rolls off the tongue.  Mother is a word you don’t say so much in daily life, unless you are Mike Pence.  So I am changing it.  That’s right it just happened right now.  I changed the name of the game.  Mom’s Day.  That’s got some heart, some pizazz.  That’s not brunch or breakfast in bed.  That’s steak and a left hook to the jaw.  I love my mom.  Mother is a word to be used in the vicinity of caskets, crime scenes, and courtrooms.  Moms are all about kids, grandkids, parks, and swimming pools.  No one says “My mother is awesome”.  They say “My mom is the bomb dot com.” (OK, maybe only I would say that.)  Mom is a word of intimacy, of life together.  A mom is a part of your life.  A mother is a psychopath invading a shower with a knife (Norman Bates for those who are confused).

My mom is for me, not against me.  My mom is on our side.  My mom knows what my daughter’s laugh sounds like and what her poop looks like.  My mom knows exactly where I work because she has visited it.  My mom knows my struggles at work because she is a teacher, too.  My mom knows my politics, my philosophy, my humor, my theology, my romanticism, my weakness, my writing (because she might be the only that reads this) because she talks to me.  Not at me.  She is a part of my life and my daughter’s life and my wife’s life and my dog’s life.  I do call her because I know she knows stuff I don’t know and has a unique perspective firmly grounded in her love for her children and grandchild(ren).  I don’t need to mount some eloquent soliloquy here because I don’t just talk to my mom once a year.  She is a part of my life because I want her to be.  And I will see her in a couple of weeks, coming from halfway across the country.  Hi Mom! See you soon Mom!  Happy Mom’s Day.  I love you more than Kim Kardashian loves walking around with no clothes on.